Wednesday, 27 August 2008

11. Like in Fairy tales.

Sometimes i wish i had the power to control time.

I feel as if my life is ending soon, whilst at the same time a new life is beginning. 
'You don't realise what you have until it's gone...' - I feel like i am about to loose so much. It's not even three weeks until i move away to London, and right now the negative is out-weighing the positive. This always seems to be the way with me. I suddenly feel so lonely.

Today i thought about leaving home and the first thing that came to my mind was my mother. I hate not being around everyone, being able to see them grow. Although i have never really had the chance to miss my mother, the thing that bothers me the most is that one day i will come home and she will look old. She will grow older. One day she will die. 

I want to be there when this day comes. I just wish it didn't have to.

I didn't have a choice as to whether i could watch my father grow old or not. I sometimes wonder how he would look today. I wish i had more to remember him by. It's so long ago now that i can't even picture him. I can't picture him anymore. I can only picture his photographs.
I wish i could picture his face, like when we were play fighting, or when he was proud of me. But i can't.

I don't have enough photographs of the people i love. 

No comments: