24. A piece of a really long message to Beth.

Flat mates. 

Katy - i really get on with Katy, she's cool but her bf is amazingly jealous of me and thinks im straight... why are straight men always jealous of me hanging with their girlfriends? freaks. I must be so masculine and cool. 

Sun - sweet korean girl... jealous of my skinny legs.

Jacqueline - Cool girl from Singapore. We always talk about clothes and how im going to steal her fred perry plimsole high tops. 

Harry - Straight guy with very bad fashion sense who is studying fashion history because he has no qualifications to do anything else, apparently. And he hasn't cooked for himself yet, well, he had a pot of beans for dinner the other day...

Henri - Yes, thats Henri with an 'I'. Well i dont know where to start with him but he is so frickin weird. I'll try to summarise everything he does and says. He has aspergers, but also lives a VERY sheltered life and has been home four times so far. He shimmies everywhere and sneaks up on you. I've got to the point where i laugh in his face because i cant contain myself. The other day he came up to me and went 'OH SPENCE, YOU KNOW THAT PETE GUY, HE'S BI, ARE YOU INTERESTED'...
I also had to help him do his washing... it was hilarious. First of all i had to help him seperate all of his whites and colours because he didnt know how to. and then bla bla bla lots happened. He asked me if he should gel his hair to go to the laundry room, and then he put some perfume on and it was hilarious... 'YOU NEVER KNOW, ITS WHERE IT ALL HAPPENS YOU KNOW IN THE LIFT.'
After he had done the washing he came into my room and said 'hey spence, im a bit confused as the tablets didnt come out at the end, are they not reuseable???'

And then the other day we were all watching TV and he was like 'let me slip into something more comfortable' so he came out in some silk purple pyjamas and was like 'WHAT DO YOU THINK, WHAT MATERIAL ARE THEY? IS SILK HOT COZ I FEEL IT RIGHT NOW'. He said this whilst rubbing the texture of his pyjama bottoms many times. Anyway , we got onto the discussion of his age and him saying how he can look back when hes old and say how a century ago he was alive. I'll write the conversation out like a play as its more entertaining.

Spencer - you wont live until youre 100 henri!
Henri - So when im 90 i'll be.....?
Lauren - youll be 90 in 2078 henri, yeah.
Henri - omg ill be 78 thats crazy, thats like 60 x 10, yeah 60 x 10 x10...
Spencer - WHAT THE FUCK HENRI HOW IS THAT 60 TIMES 10.
Lauren - OMG HENRI WHAT ARE YOU ON ABOUT.
Henri - SO HOW MUCH OF MY LIFE HAVE I ACTUALLY LIVED??

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA. 

He is so hilariously vile. Last night we went out but he couldnt come, and everyone was doing henri impressions. BAHAHAHAH
You have to come up soon and meet him. :D

I'm starting my own project about him, im going to draw him in situations and such, that i can never imagine him in. its going to be great. and ill look like a dodgey stalker :D amazing